Let us say that my friends and I are watching some comedy films. Why don’t I ever laugh along when my friends laugh, and why don’t my friends ever laugh along when I laugh? Because tastes differ. My friends like broad comedy; whereas I prefer a type of blithe gloom.
I should explain what I mean by that last term above, but I’d rather preach a sermon about the bane of youth. Remind me to write a diary entry explaining my comedy preferences, in the far future.
What do we people want from life? When I say ‘we people,’ I mean those of us who are over the age of 35; because it’s too obvious what those who are under 35 want: they want some quiet time with their electronic device of choice, in addition to an orderly occupation and traditional religion. But the real adults—the grizzled prigs with one foot in the grave—we seasoned dullards want exactly two things:
- We want to speed the growth of whatever disease our stressful career is vouchsafing to bless us with.
- We want to praise and worship our own children.
Why do humans produce children? This is what I do not understand. A person hates herself, therefore she deems it a good idea to make a copy of herself. Do two hates make a love? Now that I think of it, I guess they do. But even this love that was borne from hatred is not true love—for here’s the catch: A child is not merely a copy of your self-hating being; it is a fusion of your own hateful aspects with all the hateful aspects of your spouse.
When children are young, Nature makes them look cute (otherwise parents would throw their children out with the trash: they’re all just freeloaders)—but once the child reaches puberty, the cuteness fades. This misfortune is built into the fabric of our world.
More importantly, however, is the fact that each generation of teenagers is fully capable of running the entire nation—every aspect of it: all of business, politics, art, science, etc.—for, from the instant that a human reaches puberty, her mind and body are in optimal condition to do all things more efficiently than her elders. But the grizzled and starchy generation of people over 35 refuse to admit that they should step down, pass the baton, bow out, retire, hit the road.
So teens are prohibited from seizing the reins from their elders. This makes teens confused and bored with life: they pass the hours by sipping glasses of motor oil and green antifreeze. Then, after a few decades of this regimen, they are finally allowed to fill the position that they should have been granted from the get-go. By this time, however, the subsequent generation of youth has matured enough to hold power: thus it is necessary, in turn, to bar their advancement. Systematic deceit keeps the kayak afloat.