I am running an issue-based campaign

Here is the next page from my book of 300 Drawing Prompts. (The last appeared on May 16.) The prompt for this one was "Warrior".

Dear diary,

One thing I promise to do, when you grant me the Secret World Leadership, is to make all parking lots bigger; also I’ll move them underground. So imagine a world where parking your firetruck is really easy, because all you need to do is make a right turn onto a down-ramp, and then go straight ahead and stop between the white rectangular lines. There’s no traffic light to wait for, and the lot is so immense that it never fills up, so the free spots are easy to find. And, because it’s underground, as soon as you go back up to the surface by way of the strategically positioned spiral staircase, instead of beholding an eyesore of gray pavement littered with motorized vehicles, you see an expanse of grassland with goats grazing.

And our system of roads will be different. The entire infrastructure will be different. As it is now, there are narrow streets that permit the passage of just one autobus; therefore, if you’re like me and you prefer to ride a bicycle, you’re always being pushed off into the ditch by all the road-hogs. And in some places of the city there are bike lanes, but they’re always positioned exactly where cars wanna turn, like directly in front of a cheese store: so every single vehicle on the road will be trying to make a right turn, so that they can buy this new type of butter spread made with buffalo milk, and you who are riding your bike almost get run over & over, again & again & again, because nobody sees you.

Well, here’s the solution that I propose. During my reign, I will build clear tubes that are flat on the bottom and curvy on top, like transparent tunnels. These tubes will be installed everywhere that I normally want to bike; so even if a truck physically rams into the tube, it’s the truck that will get damaged, because the tubes are stronger than titanium; thus all the bicyclists inside of them remain safe.

And when the park that I’m biking to is on the far side of the road, instead of having to wait for traffic to die down so that I can cross the street, the tube itself will be manufactured so that it plunges down under the automobiles’ highway and resurfaces on the other side: in this way, it will literally become an underpass, just for that short stretch. Then at the end of the tube will be a permeable membrane that you can just bike straight thru, and it’ll make a sound like a waterfall gently plashing, but you won’t get wet. In fact, we’ll even put some special chemical in there that dries your skin, so that you don’t appear too sweaty to the other folks at the park (for, if your skin is like mine, you have a tendency to appear as greasy as an amphibian, and this makes you self-conscious and thus intensifies your natural shyness, therefore you’ll appreciate this anti-glistening additive), and it’ll also be scented like perfume or cologne, and it’ll contain a sunblock, as well as an agent that does either of two things: it slightly darkens light skin, if that’s your desire, or it slightly lightens dark skin, if that’s your fancy: it basically augments your natural beauty to enhance it in whatever way you want. That’s all included in the permeable membrane.

A keen reader will note that, so far, both of the bulleted points on my platform have something to do with the use of the ground below the earth, as it pertains to the management of transport.

Also, instead of warfare, we’ll switch to peacetime, so all the fully armed mechanical battle suits will be retired; and I’ll have my team of scientists tweak them so that their weapons become nonviolent, and their functionality will now be such that when you put on the suit, instead of helping you kill souls and damage personal property during a skirmish, they’ll simply allow you to ambulate underwater (note again the subterranean theme, or rather subaqueous now): sorta like that silver suit that you always see the astronauts wearing, except you won’t be limited to just floating in boring space, with your umbilical connector tethering you to your rocketship: no, these suits will be specially weighted so that you can easily stroll about beneath the sea, on the sand down there which forms the ocean’s floor.

These suits will be free to use, and available to the general public: they are hanging on racks by the side of the beach, and you can just take one down from its hanger and put it on, and go down under the water and look around at all the creatures. Just as the bike tube (mentioned above) protected us from the angry drivers of motorcars, the mechanized water-suit protects you from being harmed by sharks or stinging anemones.

My boss’s dad built this gorgeous aquarium that harbors liqui-fauna, and it has a certain type of radiant pink anemone that stings when you touch it, so Jim (my boss’s dad) must wrap cellophane around his hand before reaching in there to feed the spectacular creatures or to clean their universe. That’s where I got the idea to make the mechanized water-suit sting-proof and shark-proof.

The reason I like this idea is that I’ve always wanted to walk on the bottom of the sea, but the air that’s in my lungs dooms me to float: it literally buoys me up so that, to the sea-folk who call the water their home, I appear to be flying — OK, that’s amusing for them; but, for me, it’s a nuisance: I’m really just trying to be a normal wooden puppet like the rest of the actors in this play, yet physics renders me an airborne lava-beast (that’s how I imagine I appear when viewed thru the eyes of the undersea populace, for their vision is not as our vision).

So, as I was saying, the reason I love this idea is that it’s been my lifelong goal to walk successfully on the ocean floor, because my twin brother Jesus already figured out how to walk on its surface, as long as he calms the storm beforehand (cuz if there’s turbulence, you fall straight in, like what happened to Peter, rest his soul — he shoulda maybe refrained from sporting that millstone necklace when attempting to ape the master) [for the biblical source of these cryptic remarks, see the postscript directly after this present entry]; and, whenever possible, I try to maintain a fearful symmetry between my own accomplishments versus those of my rival, my beloved sibling.

And sometimes, when you are sauntering about underwater, a shark will bite your arm, and it just about scares the life out of you, until you recall that you’re wearing the protective suit, so the teeth cannot pierce thru the fabric: whereupon your terror instantly transforms into compassion, and you stroke the creature’s head, and it gently unclamps its jaws and sorta sniffs you out; then, once it’s satisfied that you’re not an enemy but a friend, it cheerfully swims in circles around you, as if to signal to the rest of the ocean’s populace: “This is MY cosmonaut; thou shalt not covet him.” And you laugh cheerfully at this display of affection, thus causing a burst of bubbles to ascend to the surface.

Lastly, the suit has hydraulic and electronic assistance built-in, so, when you move underwater, it’s not slow and laborious but rather normal-speed, just like moving thru regular air. So this facilitates the…

...oh, dang, now I forgot what I was gonna say. — It was something about badminton.

P.S.

When eveningtime was come, Jesus stood alone on the land; and the ship that held his disciples was in the midst of the sea.

Then there arose a great storm of wind, and the waves beat into the ship.

But Jesus rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea: Peace, be still.

And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm.

Then Jesus shouted to his disciples, who were churchgoers all: Why are ye so fearful? how is it that ye have no faith? (For he saw his disciples panicking; for the wind was contrary unto them.)

So he approached them, walking upon the sea, and, after drawing nigh, he would have passed them, seeing that they were not worth the bother; HOWEVER, when the disciples saw Jesus walking upon the sea, they cried out in unison as a storm, for they were troubled like bad weather.

And immediately Jesus talked with them, and saith unto them, Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid.

And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it truly be thou, bid me alone come out on the water unto thee.

And Jesus said, Alright, come.

And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus. But when he began to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me!!!

And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught Peter; then he said unto him (by the way, this Peter is traditionally considered the founder of the Christian Church):

O thou of little faith, wherefore dost thou desire a priestly authority? Know ye not that the kingdom of heaven is WITHIN each and every individual?

Then said he unto the rest of the disciples:

It is impossible but that offences will occur, when Peter and his priesthood seize control; therefore, thus saith the LORD God: Woe unto him, through whom these offenses come! It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of those little children.

Now the disciples were sore amazed in themselves beyond measure; and they wondered how the church, which should stand for all that is good, should become so evil, with its addiction to child abuse.

[Mark 4:37-40, 6:47-56;
Matthew 14:28-31;
Luke 17:1-2, 21]