Prosperity Theology, or the “Gospel of Success,” is a type of Christianity whose members believe that financial blessing and physical well-being represent the will of God; thus material riches are a sign of divine favor. Anyway, these people put on a big fair every year; and everyone is welcome, so I always go:
On arriving at the Annual Prosperity Gospel Festival, the first attraction one notices are all the backsides on display: The deaconesses wear very little covering (every mother in attendance is honored with the title of deaconess), as they stride around with both hands out casually caressing each other’s curves. This mutual attention is graciously accepted. And situated all over the grounds are curtained prayer booths, which the believers frequently enter in pairs or groups.
Also, like any public event where masses of affectionate people congregate, there are a lot of drugs, guns, and cops. As soon as somebody dies, the event shuts down: all the fun comes to a halt. For the police shoot teargas canisters at the crowd. That’s why I always leave the instant I sense that trouble’s about to occur; whereas, you & your woman & baby’s mom get caught in the aftermath & must blindly grope your way back to your bus while coughing & weeping.
Then, once another year has passed, the Annual Prosperity Gospel Festival recommences, and all the same stuff goes down again.
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