Heigh ho! I’m flying, flapping my black wings around. As you can see, I’m a bat. Yes, a scary vampire bat. I’ve come to dine upon your blood. First I smooch your neck, then I keep kissing down your chest till I reach your heart. Chomp, chomp: O! look at my fangs — pointy white bothersome triangles. Rarr! put away your wooden stake; that thing is a deal-breaker. What, does it have a crucifix-shaped handle? I’m flying up into the air so that you can’t reach me. I’ll just hover out here for a while and partake of the fruit trees; eat some good apples and jam. But eventually I’ll return to suck your soul. I use radar to navigate the nighttime sky; so watch out for the living-dead saber-toothed airborne mammal.
Now you run to the policeman on the street corner and cry: “Help, officer — a vampire bat just stole my infant!”
But it’s too late: you look back and see me bite your baby in the face. “Mmm, fresh blood,” I remark.
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