(Cont.)
Then, the Volcano asked the multitudes of the workforce where their leadership was hiding (for all the yogis and gurus had scattered off in fear, when they saw the wild man emancipating their interns), but the masses were clueless about these recent developments in the administrative sector, and they knew nothing of the imprisoned slave-labor force that the caravan had acquired; for, in accordance with the counsel of the volcano of potential, they had been resting during the sabbath.
So the Volcano said to the populace: “Fear not the samurais that you see sneaking over the hills; they were sent, by the sovereigns of the surrounding five boroughs of India, on a mission to do what I myself just did. I only need a moment to contact their heads of state, to clear up the misunderstanding that has arisen between our peoples. Be nice to them, if you meet them. Turn the other cheek, if smitten. Offer them cloaks, etc. In short, attenuate the tension. This will be a touchy situation, for a little while; but everything will turn out fine, in the end. There will soon be dancing and playing: just be patient. The remaining problem is that those ‘mentors’ of yours, those yogis and gurus who appointed themselves as overseers, have scrambled away and are now riddled throughout the countryside; it is my intention to blot them, but they have thoroughly blended in amongst the rest of the wildlife and the several approaching armies.”
A group of samurais then ambuscaded Yeshua, but he shook them off and spoke kindly to them, and they became friends. And similar incidents happened among the multitudes of the Volcano’s workforce, all night long; but they remained steadfast in their welcoming ways, remembering the treatment that they themselves received at the hand of the Midianites. Thus, a tragedy was avoided.
Eventually the Volcano was able to get a message out, which briefed the five potentates and their network about the actual circumstance; therefore, the samurais began to scour the landscape for self-styled mentors. When they found them in various places around the plaza, they chased them to Brattle Street, and all up and down Massachusetts Avenue, and over to John F. Kennedy Street.
Now it came to pass that, as these yogis and gurus fled before the samurais, they began to dash in and out betwixt the civilians. And there was a parade of mothers and babies which happened to be strolling down Massachusetts Avenue, and the yogis and gurus went and hid themselves amongst them, thinking that thereby they would be safe, since no god in his right mind would dare to perform a military bombardment in proximity to so many innocents. But the Volcano cast down great blazing boulders from heaven upon them, all the way to Brattle Street, and they were discomfited. Yet not one fireball hit any of the women or children.
§
And while the samurais and the Volcano were thus weeding out all these so-called mentors, the rest of the multitudes of the workforce commenced mingling with the armies of the five kings that had invaded the caravansary. And, lo, near the beginning of this immense meeting, the sun and moon fell into alignment, causing the hour to be auspicious for the creation of new stars (that is, for the conception of Promised Seeds); however, there were far more incoming waves of soldiery than could finish the multiplying procedure within the allotted frame of time. Noticing this, Satyajit’s mechanical offspring Man, the artificial grandson of King Bryan, once again alerted Yahweh in his vortex, and informed him about the window of opportunity that was rapidly narrowing.
And the wild man answered the robo-butler, saying: “What do you suggest we do about this, Emmanuel?”
And Man replied that if they could only freeze the sun and the moon in their tracks, for one full day, then all the workforce’s multitudes and the invading shock-troops could comfortably consummate their merger.
And the Volcano said: “So be it.”
Then Man, the android grandchild of King Bryan, raised his voice while shaking his fist at heaven and said: “O Sun, stand still, or I will strike thee!” And he spoke likewise to the moon.
Then the sun froze, and the moon halted trembling, until the people had successfully coupled with all their new acquaintances. If you desire to know the details of this partnership, there is a lost scripture called the Book of Jasher: go find that – the whole steamy affair is preserved therein.
Anyway, so the sun and moon stood stock still, up in the heaven, and remained there motionless, one full day.
And there has never been another eclipse like that one, which lasted so long that Time Itself increased and multiplied; wherein the present moment was seen to be (in the words of Whitman) “carrying the crescent child that carries its own full mother in its belly.”
This also marked the only time that the Lord GOD ever hearkened to the voice of a robot.
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