Your Candidate Won the Presidency

Here is something good to know: Your favored candidate won the election, so he is our president. He shall now govern well. 

To review: Our newest president is your favored candidate. He got the top score in the ballot count by a significant amount of votes.

Now all the problems of the nation are in the process of being solved. Previous presidents, for one reason or another, could not get the job done, but your candidate shall most certainly be a success. So, prepare to live a much better life, with liberty and happiness. 

We should thank the voting populace, as it was The People who selected your candidate for the highest office. I expect that things will improve quickly. Even if you fear that the opposition party will block his efforts, and thus your candidate might not be able to govern with perfection, I advise you not to worry: you’ll be surprised how much your candidate will please you.

I personally love and respect our new president, who was your preferred choice among the candidates. To show my appreciation, I clap my hands for the individual.

Now that a little time has passed, we’ve been able to witness a few of your candidate’s initial accomplishments as president; therefore, allow me to voice a few more statements of praise. 

This new president’s governing style is terrific: He chases our enemies out on limbs. I’m so glad that he won the election. Now things are fun. That is good news — do you understand the implications of this? We now have a president who’s smart plus hot. Thus, those who are homeless have fresh hope; those who are hungry can be considered virtually fed; and those who are naked may now apply for clothing in person. Plus there are two blinking lights that say “education” and “health care”. 

Your favored candidate shall continue to do an extremely good job; I can feel it. He has already saved our country from pain and hate: No one any longer acts divisively. And I believe that your guy, who is now the president, shall even find a way to eliminate death and reduce the waiting period for handgun purchases. — I dedicate this essay to your favored candidate.