Stingray Kiddie Pool

Oh what fun it is to splash in the water on a hot summer day. All of us children are laughing and playing in the hotel’s pool. However—ZAP!—now my friend Tommy gets shocked to death by a passing stingray. And then—ZAP! ZAP!—Suzie and Johnnie are struck down as well. “Everybody remain calm,” announces the lifeguard; “just try to float on your back and don’t make any waves.” This speech is punctuated by another loud ZAP! and, trying not to sound panicked, the lifeguard adds: “Kids, do not pet the aquatic creatures.” 

Standing next to a suited executive near the entrance of the pool room, the hotel’s manager leans over and says: “What the heck is going on here—was this your idea? Oh my gosh, I can already feel the insurance premium going through the roof!” 

MORAL: Don’t ever build a recreational area for children and then fill it with dangerous animals.

ADVERTISEMENT: Wow! Awesome! Listen, kids: Come on down to Toot’s Hotel, rent a room, and dive into the Stingray Kiddie Pool! Swim around, try not to drown! Don’t forget to continue cavorting! Splash and play in the bloody water! If you’re too scared to venture into the deeper regions, just stay in the shallow end and step over the bodies congesting the floor. The whole pool is filled with fish — sink in and have a time! Our stingrays are lethal: not only do they shock; they also bite!