[The sections of this entry correspond to the chapters in the King James Bible as follows: 1–3 = same; 4 = 5; 5 = 6; 6 = 7; 7 = 8; 8 = 9; 9 = 10; 10 = 11; 11 = 14; 12 = 15; 13 = 16.]
1
The Dipper John was baptizing in the desert. Everyone from Sweet Beulah Land in Eldorado came to him, asking to be cleansed of corruption. John wore a camel’s hair mantle, with a girdle of goatskin about his loins; and his diet was locusts and honey.
Now, after every session of washing, John the Dipper would tell the multitudes: “Listen, I have baptized you with water, but my supervisor will baptize you with lava.”
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Eventually Jesus came from Nazareth and got baptized by John the Dipper.
Immediately after that, the wind guided Jesus into the wilderness. And he was there forty days, being tempted to sign a contract with Belial, who represented the leading creditors of that time. But Jesus declined this offer.
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Now after the Dipper John was imprisoned, Jesus returned to the region of his hometown, spreading his message of mass personal debt forgiveness, proclaiming the Time of Jubilee.
And Jesus gained popularity also as a physician, for he healed many that were sick of diverse illnesses.
§
One day, very early in the morning, Jesus awoke and found a solitary place to meditate. And a crowd of people came seeking him, so his small group of followers went and found Jesus where he was meditating, and they said: “Everyone wants to see you.”
Jesus answered: “Let us go into the next towns; for I aim to deliver my message there, as well. It is not my priority to cure people’s physical ailments: I do that only on account of pity; it’s a diversion. The true reason I started my work as a prophet is to spread the good news about the Jubilee of Leviticus 25, where Yahweh God commands mass personal debt forgiveness, a total reset of ownership, and the return of the land to the people. What is important is that all power be transferred away from the private creditors, back to the public, and that the commons be restored.”
So his small group of disciples followed him as Jesus trekked from church to church around that region proclaiming the Jubilee, and healing people on the side.
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Then a man who was suffering from leprosy approached and begged Jesus to help him. Moved by compassion, Jesus cured the man.
Now, as he sent the healed man away, Jesus strictly commanded him, saying: “Say nothing about this to anyone.”
But the man went out and told everyone he met how Jesus had cured him. So the fame of Jesus grew fast, and it became so intense that he could no longer openly walk through any city; crowds mobbed him everywhere; therefore, he stuck to desert places.
2
Then Jesus went into a house, and multitudes responded to the news that he was there: they packed the place, hoping to get free medical attention. As they brought him a man who was paralyzed, Jesus attempted to draw the crowd’s focus to his economic message by saying, when he healed the man: “Arise, go in health now; your debts are all forgiven.”
Now there were certain creditors there among the masses; and they did not like this message that Jesus was spreading. On hearing his words above, they said in their hearts: “This is blasphemous! Debts are sacred: only God can forgive them.”
3
Therefore, these creditors went forth and took counsel with the religious leaders of the church, and the heads of the state, how they might destroy Jesus.
4
Now a clergyman came to Jesus and begged him to heal his dying daughter. Jesus was willing, so the clergyman led him toward his house.
Then, as they were walking, a maid came running from the house and cried to the clergyman: “Your daughter is dead. We no longer need the physician.”
But when Jesus heard this, he said: “Let me come along, anyway.”
So they entered the house where the clergyman’s daughter was. When Jesus looked at her, he turned and said to the rest of the household: “What are you all weeping about? This girl is only asleep.”
Now the clergyman and his household scorned Jesus’ judgment. But then Jesus took the girl’s hand and said: “Damsel, arise.” And straightway she woke up and walked about the room.
The clergyman and his servants were amazed.
Then Jesus commanded them strictly to tell no one about this healing.
5
All the while, Jesus kept visiting the churches in every town, announcing his message of debt cancellation and Jubilee.
At about this time, John the Dipper was beheaded by the creditors.
6
As Jesus traveled, the multitudes crowded him.
Once, they brought to him a man who was deaf and mute. Jesus looked up to heaven and sighed. Then he said: “Open your mouth.” But the man remained motionless. So Jesus opened the man’s mouth with his hands, and pulled on his tongue; then Jesus spit, and put his fingers into the man’s ears. After this, Jesus said to the man: “Can you hear me now?”
And this man, who had been deaf and mute, now gasped and thanked the prophet for healing him.
But Jesus commanded all those who were present to tell no one about this. But the more he urged them to keep quiet, the more they spread the news.
7
When he came to the next town, they brought him a blind man. Jesus took him by the hand and led him out of the town, away from the crowd, to avoid attracting unwanted publicity. Then Jesus spit on the blind man’s eyes, and asked him if he saw anything now.
The man looked around and said: “I see men as trees walking.”
So, Jesus put his hands on the man’s eyes. After that, his vision was totally restored, and he saw everything clearly.
Then Jesus told the man: “Go straight home; avoid the town, and do not tell this to anyone.”
§
As they were leaving that place, Jesus asked his small group of disciples: “Who do people say that I am?”
And they answered: “Some say that you are the Dipper John reanimated. Some say Elijah; others, Orpheus or Dionysus. A few think that you are the biological son of Yahweh. And some claim that you are the Most High God himself.”
Then Jesus said: “But whom do you say I am?”
And they answered as one: “You are King Bryan from planet Jupiter.”
Then he strictly commanded them that they should tell no one about him.
8
Now when Jesus passed through any city, he tried to do so quietly, without attracting attention, for he suspected that the creditors were planning to kill him.
9
Jesus and his small group of disciples finally came to Sweet Beulah Land of Eldorado; which he had explained was a dangerous place for them, because of the creditors. Jesus advanced; and his disciples followed him, trembling with fear.
10
When they came to the temple, Jesus entered and began to cast out all the sellers and buyers, and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers, and the seats of the merchants.
11
After two days was the festival of Easter, and the creditors sought how they might take Jesus by guile and put him to death.
Now Jesus went into a garden near a hill to meditate. He fell on the ground and prayed, asking to be spared a violent death: “O Yahweh,” Jesus cried, “take away from me this cup of doom!”
And he repeated this prayer, again and again.
Then, as he was speaking, a company of soldiers in service of the creditors came to arrest Jesus, and they took him.
And all his disciples had fled away.
§
They brought Jesus to a great house owned by one of the creditors. There they performed a show trial, which returned the verdict of capital punishment for Jesus.
12
The leadership of the church and state, acting in service of the creditors, then ordered Jesus to be brought to the Place of the Skull, which is where they performed all their executions. There they nailed him to a cross:
Jesus hung there until midafternoon, at which point he cried aloud: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” Then he expired.
They took down his corpse immediately, wrapped it in graveclothes, and laid it in a sepulcher, so that everyone could get on with celebrating the Easter holiday. The entrance of the tomb was then sealed with a giant stone.
13
When Easter was over, all the women who had loved the Nazarene set out to visit his grave. They brought flowers, spices, and oil to anoint the corpse. It was before sunrise, and as they walked, they said to one another: “At this early hour, there will likely not be anyone available to help us remove the giant stone that blocks the tomb’s entryway.” – But when they arrived, behold, the stone was already pushed aside (a difficult chore, for this stone was enormous); and when the women entered the sepulcher, lo, they found a young man sitting therein, clothed in a white garment. The women were scared; and the young man said unto them:
“Fear not. You seek Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He is risen; he is not here. Come, look at this place where they laid him. I now command you: go back and tell his disciples that he shall meet them in Eldorado – there you will find him, as was prearranged.”
And the women went out quickly, and fled from the sepulcher, trembling with amazement. They said nothing about this to anyone; for they were afraid.
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